Monday, April 22, 2013

Never want to forget.


I find myself lying in bed lately, playing things the kids have said or done over and over again in my mind. I want to remember it all. I'm amazed at how things they did frequently became such a part of them and I thought I would never forget it. Then they slowly grow out of it and before I know it they've changed and the thing they did a hundred times a day seems so far away. 

It happened last night. Vanessa asked me to tell her a story from when she was little, I laugh a little thinking she still is little, but I started telling stories of her three years of life. I told her how she used to called Elijah, IE. As soon as I told her, is when it hit me she doesn't do that anymore. The only thing she used to call him over and over again, and now it's just Elijah. 

Things I want to remember....


Elijah asks questions that he already has an answer for. It will go something like this...
Mama, what do you want to do tonight. 
Me: I don't know, probably just go to bed.
Elijah: yeah, but what do you really most want to do tonight.
(he's hoping I'll say watch a movie)

When he enjoys something I cook...
Mama, this tastes like Yum. 

Mama, boys are made out of Chocolate and food.

Instead of using the word, people, he says, human. 
"Mama, those humans are so nice." I kind of feel like we're from another planet when he says that.  

Elijah and Vanessa are getting to a place where they're a little too concerned for the others spiritual well being.
Elijah: Mama, Nay is not acting like a child of God, but I am. 



(Elijah loves to be like his dada. shaving with my comb.)

Vanessa accidentally knocked Elijah. I explained to her that even though it was an accident she still needed to say she was sorry. She got confused somewhere along the way and in her most motherly voice looked at Elijah with finger wagging in his face and said, Elijah, say you're sorry! 
I said, no Nay you say it. She then looked down to the ground and in a quiet whisper said, I'm sorry. Then immediately looked up, resumed her motherly tone and finger waving and said, 
Now, say you forgive me.

I was gone one day for and they had a babysitter. When I came home she was telling me how they did and mentioned there was a little problem at lunch. They were both fighting over who got to pray. Somehow Vanessa won. With a bowed head, closed eyes, and folded hands, she said, "God, please forgive me for being selfish."
Clearly, my parenting needs a little help.

Nay likes to add 's' to the end of her words....dada, yous wants to plays with me? It is incredibly cute. 

Vanessa, sings everything. 
She put on her dada's shirt the other day and said to me,
"when I'm wearing this, it feels like dada's cuddling me."


Amelia isn't saying much, but there is never any question to what she wants. She has learned quickly to hold her own with Elijah and Vanessa. She's the sweetest thing though and loves to be cuddled. She smiles all the time and gets very excited when dada comes home. She won't say mama no matter how hard I try. She says dada, duck, dog, take this, elijah, granddad, but not mama. She's started wearing some of Nay's clothes. Soon I'll be passing Amelia's clothes to Nay. She's going through another growth spurt right now and sleeps all the time. I wasted the first two days of this constant sleeping by worrying what was wrong, but then I remembered Elijah and Vanessa going through these phases and started enjoying the long naps. 


(Vanessa takes the best care of Amelia.)




Friday, April 19, 2013

a little bit of this and that...

Have you noticed that every time you've come to the blog lately something looks a little different? Well, that's cause I'm trying to change my layout a bit, but it's proven to be quite difficult. My sweet friend Davi has been working with me and I'm very thankful, but some of it we just haven't figured it out yet. Bare with me and maybe someday it will be done.


I bought makeup the other day. Something I rarely do. I replace my mascara, but that's about it. I hate to admit it, but I've become one of those moms. The one I said I never would be. The one who is lucky to get a shower in by dinner time and who lives in sweats. It's a far cry from the wife I thought I would be. You can laugh all you want, but when Caleb and I were dating I actually believed that Caleb would never see me without makeup. I thought when we got married that I would wake up, put a little mascara and eyeliner on before Caleb woke up and saw me. Crazy! I really don't know what I was thinking or why I cared that much. But I think I've gone a little too hippie and it's time to start putting a little more effort in how I look. I believe it's important to take care of yourself and I want to stay attractive for Caleb. 

Speaking of Caleb...he's pretty much the greatest...surprised me with flowers, even though I don't shower, took me on a date last week, and watched the Voice with me.





My mom and I have talked a lot about memorizing scripture lately and last night she shared an interview with me with a lady who's been faithfully memorizing scripture for the last thirty years. She talked about how radically it transformed her spiritual life. I believe this is an answer to prayer for me. I've been asking the Lord to show me ways to deepen our relationship and here it is. So simple, know Him by hiding his word in my heart. We're going to start working on memorizing one book of the bible at a time. 



Spring is here. It's been a cold one though and I'm a little concerned for my rose bushes. It's another reminder to me of why I love living in a place with seasons. I enjoy it so so much. I love seeing God's creativity in His creation. Every time I see a new bud I'm amazed. 

My close friends all live out of state. It's felt a little lonely lately. I wish that traveling wasn't so expensive. I've come to appreciate those relationships even more. Isn't it funny how that works. I appreciated them when we lived close, but I didn't understand how sweet those relationships were until we lived apart. It has caused me lean more on my Savior. He is the friend that I'll never be without and that isn't just a far off thought now. It's a reality that has grown very precious to me. 



It's a busy weekend for us. Elijah has his last two soccer games. He's enjoyed playing and it's been really good for him. Nay turns three, which is hard to imagine. She's been looking forward to her birthday since Christmas. She's so excited and when you ask her what she wants she says, pink and Yiayia and Papa. And I have our churches women's retreat, which I should probably go get ready for. 

So, and end to this very random post and have a wonderful weekend.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Nay


Nay,
Sometimes you find your way to our bed in the early mornings, or I nap with you on Saturday afternoons. These are some of my favorite moments with you. When you think I've fallen asleep, which I never have, you cup my face in your hands and kiss me over and over. You then take your tiny little fingers and trace my face. I lay there wishing time would stop. It's in these moments I'm so grateful that I'm your mama. That I'm the one who gets to know you in ways no one else does. I wonder why you're so affectionate when you think I don't know.

You're like that a lot. You love to sing, but not when people watch. And you love to play that you're the mommy with your dolly's, but not if someone looks. You bury your face in your hands and get so shy if you catch me looking. 

I wonder, but really I know how you feel. I often feel shy and insecure. You and I are a lot alike. I see you bury your face in your hands when you catch me looking at you and I can feel what you're feeling. I pray that our similarities draw us closer together. I pray that I'll have wisdom to guide you and compassion for you. I pray you'll trust me, knowing I've walked the road ahead of you. I hope that you'll learn sooner than I did to find you're security in Christ. And I hope you always know how much I adore you.

I love you so so much. 
Mama.

Sunday, April 14, 2013

some of our last week....

I just wrote out a long post, which hasn't happened much obviously, but blogger lost it and now I'm back to ground zero. So, instead of the long post here's some pictures from our week.

Spring is here...my favorite time of year. I spent much of my day staring out at what the kids have started calling, mama's tree. 

Amelia likes to find her way to my lap anytime I'm reading. She sits so still and just looks at whatever book I'm reading. I love these moments.


I'm in the trenches of parenting right now. Each morning I think it's going to be a better day than the last, but no. The kids are growing into new stages, testing boundaries, and keeping me on my toes. I'm very thankful for my mom who continually gives me incredible wisdom for parenting them and also helps out by stocking our fridge. 

Friday we went on a date...first one since January. I think we might need to work on that.


Saturday Elijah got his first bike.

He looks so much older riding a bike. It's kind of hard for me to believe it's him.

 He's been a lot more helpful around the house lately and Saturday he told Caleb he wanted to set the table for dinner. I'm not sure how useful the napkins were, but he was so sweet. 

Saturday night was family night....I hope the children always enjoy it as much as they did that night.



 And Sunday was church...Nay was so happy to pick out her own outfit. 



P.S. what are you guys using now that google reader is gone? I'm kind of missing it a lot.

Sunday, April 7, 2013

a rainy april day...


 I don't have many words this evening. I keep trying to think of something to say that might sound half way inspired, but I'm drawing a blank. It was a long week with very little exciting to report. Caleb's work is busy and the children tested me on every front. 
Life isn't always glamorous, in fact I would argue that it rarely is, but there is beauty found in the long weeks. These are the times to faithfully keep walking the path God's given you and to trust God's word that, "suffering produces endurance, endurance produces character, and character hope, and hope does not disappoint." 

And to not overlook the sweet moments.

Elijah wants to be just like his daddy.




Caught Nay taking a break from gardening to pray for Granddaddy. 



And sweet Amelia works so hard to keep up. 


Thursday, April 4, 2013

Easter.

I look forward to Easter as soon as Christmas ends. Christmas and Easter are so intertwined that I can't think of one without the other. Caleb and I spent the month of March reading, Jesus Keep Me Near the Cross and doing a devotional with the kids called, Why Easter. (both we would highly recommend in preparing your hearts for Easter) 
Each year since I came to know Christ Easter has grown more dear to me. I am more and more overwhelmed at God's love for me and what it cost for Jesus to die on the cross for my sins. 
This year was one of my favorite Easter's. I'm not sure why. It was probably one of the more quiet simple Easter's we've had, but it was so special to me. 

We spent the weekend remembering and celebrating.
 We had a wonderful Good Friday service.
We dyed eggs and did our Easter egg hunt on Saturday.
Then Sunday we woke up and Caleb made egg's Benedict. (something he grew up doing) 
I hid the children's Easter baskets and they followed a trail of eggs to find them.
We went to church.
And then had a delicious meal at my parents.

 (we keep a cross in the yard for the weeks leading up to Easter. On Good Friday we drape it in black. Then on Sunday we wrap it in purple.)




I had quite the time getting a picture of the children. I decided it wasn't something worth getting frustrated on Easter about, so I let it go....so this is all I've got.







(Vanessa wore a dress that my mom made when I was little and Amelia wore a hand-me down from my sister Abigail.)



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