Wednesday, November 30, 2011

On coming home....

I'm slightly baffled at the range of emotions I felt on my trip. The excited anticipation to see family and friends is strong, while feeling torn knowing I'm going to miss Caleb. I feel the stress of preparing to leave for over two weeks and traveling alone with two little ones and my ever growing belly. Once I'm there it feels like being home, so comfortable and wonderful. I'm flooded again with all that I've missed since moving away and don't want to miss a moment of it.

We had sweet times catching up face to face, laughing together, and making new memories. I loved seeing how excited the kids were to see the family they've missed so much and I ached knowing we had to leave and they'd miss them again. 

While I was there we dealt with teething, sleepless nights, and a stomach bug. There were moments I wanted to be in our home, our own beds, our own routine to deal with my sick babies. 

But I quickly remembered that dealing with sickness isn't easy no matter where you are and at least my mom and I were doing it together. I know looking back I'll remember the good, not the tired. And I know that as much as I love being home, and I do, once I'm back I'll start missing everyone again. It was a lesson in living in the moment and appreciating it for exactly what it was, the good and bad.

Now, I'm back. It feels good. I'm excited to get back into our routine, decorate for Christmas, and sleep in my own bed, but mountains of paper work, laundry, and yard work have been waiting and I wonder if I should have stayed away for a little longer:) Being content. Being settled. Being right where God wants us to be. It's a lesson for me to continually learn. So, I'm going to go blast some Christmas music, make some hot tea, and get to work. 

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Tell me a story.

When I was little my sisters and I would ask our parent to tell us stories all the time. Our favorite kind of stories didn't come out of storybooks though, they were our stories. We liked hearing the funny things we did when we were little and about our parents when they were little. 

They were just as exciting the first time as the one hundredth, but by the one hundredth they'd become apart of us. This was our history and the stories helped shape who we are.

I guessed one day my children would ask me to tell them a story about when I was little, but when Elijah first did it felt surreal. I feel like a kid that someone should be telling stories to not the adult telling the stories, but there you were laying in bed asking me to tell you a story about when I was little. 

Well, Elijah here are a couple stories for you to tell your kids...

The other night I heard you talking to your dad while I was cleaning the kitchen. You asked him if he had a special "yiayia" blanket (all the grandkids have special blankets that Caleb's mom makes them when they're born.) 

Daddy told you he didn't have one and You said, knowing full well what daddy was getting for Christmas, "well, maybe you'll get one for Christmas." 
Great...that surprise is now ruined:) 

You walked out of your room one afternoon and I told you to pick up your toys. You immediately closed your eyes and started making snoring sounds and informed me that you couldn't cause you were sleeping walking.

As I was walking down the hallway towards your room I heard Nay getting into something she shouldn't be. When I walked in you looked at me and said "don't worry mom I just need to deal with Nay for a minute."

It was still so early you should have been sleeping. I was sipping my tea and reading when you started yelling, "mommy! mommy!" I quickly ran into your room and asked what was wrong. As I laid down next to you you said, "I just wanted to hear your voice saying, I love you, Elijah." 

These are just a few of the funny things you do and say that keep me on my toes. I love you, Elijah.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Enjoying it...

As a stay at home mom I feel blessed beyond what I deserve. I love my calling and believe that it is the highest one I have apart from being Caleb's wife. Shaping the hearts of these precious children is an incredible joy and responsibility. 

Mothering comes naturally for me. That doesn't mean it's always been easy, but I do feel made specifically for this job. I don't mind dirty diapers or having my schedule interrupted because someone is teething. I enjoy all these moments and soak them up cause I know they're fleeting. 

It's a hard job that we're called to though. It wears on us in every way, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Our identities are so wrapped up in others. We give all of ourselves to our husbands and our children. Which, I love doing, but I do need encouragement along the way. I'm just finishing reading a book called Loving the Little Years and it's been the encouragement I need at times. I've been renewed to keep loving this time and not take it for granted. If you need a little encouragement then go here and get yourself a copy. 

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